What She Wants

What A Woman Wants

Drama.
That's all she really wants. Back in the 70's, I heard a girl say, "If my man don't whoop my ass, I don't know if he really loves me..." I believe that she meant it. That was part of the culture back then. I don't think they want that nowadays. But they want some kind of drama, just the same. If you don't give them some drama, they can, and will make up little melodramas as they go along.
Drama can be something as simple as, having your girlfriend call the house. But if she doesn't it won't matter, because anyone who hangs up on her after getting a wrong number could be your girlfriend, and in the absence of any real drama, she can build a whole scenario around a simple hang-up.
You go to work everyday around little hairballs, who happen to be women. But it would take the forensic prowess of Dr. Henry Lee to explain the technique of secondary fiber transfer, of evidence once she discovers the odd appearance of a strand of blonde hair on your wool sports coat. (The same coat that you were wearing when you met her...)
Ever drink a fruit juicy Hawaiian punch during the drive home, and then smoke a cigarette. A soap opera inspired woman, will get in your car and know without a doubt that a cigarette smoking hussy, with #6 red lipstick has been in the car with you. She won't say anything though. Not until she gets a chance to look in the glove box for some overwhelming evidence, like a pair of light blue panties.
What I'm saying is that you will never keep your woman happy, if you play it straight. You need to leave a phone number on the dresser every now and again, or let her see you taking your cell phone in the bathroom with you. It works the other way, too. Occasionally when you answer the phone, and somebody hangs up, you need to make a real big deal about it. Accuse her of something awful, and have a huge blow out. (She's going to kill you in bed when you make up.)
Women are emotional creatures. Men are not. Women need to have their emotions wrenched and twisted virtually everyday, even if you're just play acting. They compare their lives to those of Rachel, and Ms. Chancellor, or some other soap star. Without a bunch of drama in your relationship, she will suspect her female co-workers of trying to destroy her career, or she will see something in your kid's eye that leads her to believe that his girl friend is forcing him to smoke dope.
Trust me. Go home out in the kitchen right now, and start a fight with her. She'll love you for it.