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| VOL 41 NUMBER 28 - OCT. 2001 -
Published By The DFA Publishing Company |
FIRST
CASE OF GENITAL ANTHRAX REPORTED
 Doctor Willie Homer Bigun,
head of the New Mexico Center for Disease Control
warns of a dangerous new infectious strain of the
anthrax virus.
Patrick Boneon, a night
security guard at the  John Dear Dairy Farms in
Sprague, New Mexico has apparently been infected
by the rare strain, localized in his genitalia
area. According to Mr. Boneon, he met a charming
young foriegn woman at a truck stop bar outside
of Rosswell. She invited him up to her room,
hoovering above a diner, where she proceeded to
seduce him.
"I noticed that there was
a powdery substance all up in there, Mr.
Boneon recalled about the encounter during his
debriefing by FBI and CDC agents. But I
thought that it was just some new form of contraception, and I
just jumped right on in."
The i ncident
is being described as the first case of STAB
(sexually transmitted anthrax bugs), and the
symptoms seem to be a mildly uncomfortable rash
that "Causes my nuts to itch like the
dickens..." said Mr. Boneon. The FBI
has launched a search for the female carrier,
code named, "Hot Box" She is
described as a 4' 11" female of undetermined
ethnicity. She had real big eyes, little to no
hair, a small slitted nasal opening and a lipless
mouth with no teeth. According to Mr. Boneon, a
lot of women in that part of New Mexico have no
teeth, or lips either, so he found nothing
suspicious about that. Anyone coming into contact
with a girl fitting Hot Box's description should
contact officials immediatly after leaving the
hotel room. Dr. Bigun warns that nobody should be
out there having unprotected sex in these
difficult times.
The FBI does not suspect
terrorism in this case, nor do they think that it
is gang related or some kind of hate crime.
"Just a one night stand
gone bad, said Dr. Bigun. It's happened
to all of us."
Authorities are seeking Ms.
Box for questioning by the INS concerning a
probable VISA violation, while the FBI wants to
question her about possible links to a series of
unsolved abduction cases in the South-Eastern
counties of New Mexico. The CDC just wants to
clear up her venereal disease before somebody
gets hurt. |
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